Unhinged

 I seem to remember (in 2015) having to take French radio stations to task for the insane speed at which journalists dispensed information to the bemused listener. Unhinged is the word that springs to mind, and I am sorry to report that things have only got worse in the intervening years... If I had the energy, I could probably calculate the speed of the torrent or stream of words. 

My brain is struggling at the best of time but of course I now have to contend with advancing age and what is known in the trade as dementia. I do appreciate, of course, that radio journalists are now paid by the word and I accept that I can no longer be expected to remember anything for more than 30 seconds. But if I can't even make out what they are saying in "real time" there is no point in listening to them at all. 

For anyone familiar with audiobooks, however, the solution is staring us in the face: just reduce the speaking speed to suit your needs. But, you may counter, we are talking about "live" programmes here. How could the audiobook approach expect to function in the real world? 

I have an answer to that as well. Have you ever wondered how broadcasters manage to filter out the foul language, horrendous abuse and conspiracy theories abounding in the endless phone-in discussion programmes in which listeners are invited to give their opinion on any subject under the sun?

Nothing could be simpler. The broadcaster just staggers the discussion by about ten seconds, so that "unwelcome" or "inappropriate" contributions can be deleted. In return, the station gets something which costs literally nothing to produce and can generate megabucks.

It seems extraordinary that it should be left to members of the gerontocracy such as me to come up with this solution.