A priest, a minister and a rabbi are discussing the beginning of life. The priest says it begins at conception. The minister says it begins at birth. “And you?” they ask the rabbi. “When do you believe life begins?” He gives a shrug. “When the kids move out and the dog dies.”
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The Airplane! movie spoofs were sometimes rather heavy going but Peter Graves, who died recently, was never less than wonderful as the airline pilot, with lines delivered deadpan and in deadly earnest such as: "Joey, do you like movies about gladiators?" or "Have you ever been in a Turkish prison?"
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